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Ep. #58: Why Teens Are Sleep Deprived, The Ramifications And How To Help

When my son was a baby, at sometime around the 3 month mark I remember him sleeping for 5 hours straight and I thought I’d won the lottery! I didn’t realize just how precious a commodity sleep would be…for the next 18 years – for him, for me, for my husband.

All through school, he either couldn’t get to sleep or would wake up a few hours into it and be unable to go back to sleep. Year after year my husband and I kept saying, surely he’s going to sleep through the night by the time he’s in high school! HA! I couldn’t have been more wrong. There were days we’d drag him out of bed and send him off to school knowing there was no way he’d be able to learn anything. And there were plenty of days I let him sleep in. Trying to figure out how to help him get to sleep and stay asleep, was a constant in our life – and he wasn’t the only one who was sleep deprived.

I’m certain ADHD and anxiety played a role. And because he’d always had sleep issues, it was just a normal thing in middle school…and in high school when his anxiety worsened and he developed major depression and was using weed and other substances, the sleep problems just intensified – for ALL of us. But I didn’t realize at the time, that so many of his peers, without his particular issues, were also having a hard time getting enough sleep.

This is Ann Coleman attorney turned parent educator and mom to a kid who struggled during his teen years. You’re listening to Speaking of Teens, a twice-weekly science-informed podcast that helps you better understand, relate to, and parent your teen.

On today’s episode 58, Why are teens so sleep deprived? What are the ramifications and what can we do to help them?

Now, looking back, I can say that my son was atypical as far as sleep issues in teens go. He had insomnia, which is different from the basic adolescent sleep issues I’m going to talk about today. If your teen is up at 3 am and can’t sleep or going to sleep at midnight and waking up at 2 or 3, that’s likely a different situation and one you should discuss very soon with your pediatrician. There could be underlying medical or mental health issues that need to be addressed. And I’ll search for an expert in adolescent insomnia to come on the show and discuss those issues.

But today, we’re going to talk about the typical teen who is in a chronic state of sleep deprivation.

 

According to Dr. Mary Carskadon, a renowned sleep researcher and expert, adolescents need more sleep than younger kids - least 9.25 hours a night. And according to her team’s research they’re getting, on average, around 2 to 3 hours less than that.

 

Back in 2010, researchers conducted a large-scale study of American high school students and found that only 8% get the recommended amount of sleep. About 23% are only getting an average of 6 hours sleep per night and around 10% of them were only getting around 5 hours a night.

 

And according to the CDC’s 2019 statistics based on state surveys of high school students, anywhere from 70 to 84% get less than 8 hours sleep per night with girls, seniors and Asian Americans all being up there in the 80 to 83% range.

 

Why? Well, it’s a really potent mixture of neurobiology, school start times, academic pressures, and devices.

 

Let’s start with the neurobiology. You may not realize this – I didn’t until I started studying when my son was 18 years old – but most adolescents experience a huge shift in their sleep habits. They start staying up a lot later - and you know how hard they are to wake up in the morning. Now, there are a few outliers who still manage to get to bed early and jump out of bed in the morning. But most likely you have a kid who’s not going to sleep until around midnight and having a really hard time getting up at 5, 6 or 7 in the morning for school.

 

One major reason for this? Melatonin. Melatonin isn’t just a sleep supplement you buy at the store. It’s actually a hormone primarily produced in the brain’s Pineal gland and is associated with our body getting ready for sleep.

 

And the brain’s biological clock - located in the hypothalamus – is the thing that controls the pineal gland’s production of melatonin - based our circadian rhythms – that’s our 24-hour cycle of physical, mental, and behavioral changes – all based on the amount of light entering our eyes – the retina.

 

So, the brain produces and releases melatonin gradually over this 24-hour period.

Melatonin gradually increases as the sun begins to go down, it peaks in the middle of the night and then steadily decreases as the sun comes up and becomes brighter throughout the day.

 

As you can imagine, all of this worked much better back in the good old days before electricity – people went to sleep shortly after it got dark outside and got up when the sun came up.

 

But here’s the kicker for adolescents – beginning when puberty hits, sometime around age 10 to 12, the biological clock shifts and that gradual increase in the production of melatonin is delayed for at least a couple of hours. And that 2-hour delay in the production of melatonin means at least a 2-hour delay in getting to sleep at night.

But they’re also messing with that melatonin release with their screens. Our teen’s electronic devices emit blue light, which also delays the release of melatonin. We’ve known for years they need to turn them off at least an hour or more before bedtime. Yet, smart phones have become a security blanket for too many of our middle and high schoolers.

 

According to a 2019 report sponsored by Common Sense Media, 70% of adolescents use their phones within 30 minutes of going to bed.  68% of them keep their phones either in the bedroom or within reach each night (29% keep them in the bed). Not only that but 36% of them check their phones during the night.

 

A new study released in May of this year (2023) at about the same time as the APA and Surgeon General Advisories came out, just confirms what we know; screens and use of social media, especially, delay sleep - so they have to stay out of the bedroom at night.

 

The study found that about 16% of the 10,000 teens contained in the data set, had trouble falling asleep or staying asleep, at least several days, in the previous 2 weeks, with about 17% saying they’d been woken up by calls, texts – notifications – at least once in past week. And a full 20% said if they wake up in the middle of the night, the first thing they grab is their phone – which was associated with a 34% higher risk of sleep problems. Having any screen in the bedroom was associated with a 27% higher risk of having trouble falling or staying asleep.

 

Even if they are not using electronics right before bed or keeping them in the bed at night, other research indicates spending 3 or more hours a day on devices increases an adolescent’s chance of getting less than 7 hours of sleep by 28%.  And daily users of social media, no matter the time spent, increase their chances of losing sleep by 19%. And if I recall correctly, in either episode 54 or 55 we said that the majority of teens in the US spend around 3 and a half hours just on social media.

 

And a Common Sense Media report from 2021 shows tweens and teens spend a total of from 5 ½ hours for tweens and 8 ½ hours a day for teens, on some sort of screen for entertainment purposes. Now, hang on because those numbers blew my mind too. In the report they explain that this includes all that time they look at their phones during breakfast, on the bus, and it also includes BOTH the time they spend with a TV on, while working on their laptop and looking the phone all at one time – so they count that 3 different times. Even so – it’s a lot of time. And it also just illustrates how much screens are probably cutting into sleep. And I will say, this included data from during the pandemic so hopefully, we’ll see those numbers go down some the next time such a report comes out.

 

Another huge reason teens are losing sleep, especially as they get up into their junior and senior years, is homework and studying overload. I spoke with Christine Kaplan about the homework issue back in episode 44 if you want to have a listen. Depending on who’s numbers you go by, teens in the US average just over 3 hours of homework a night (according to a Stanford study) or about 7 a week according to another study. Many teens are staying up half the night doing homework and studying. And we could debate all day whether the hours and hours of time our kids spend outside of school doing homework and studying is actually necessary or not, the negative implications are pretty darn clear. You can actually look at the statistics and see a correlation in the years where homework started to tick upwards and when teens’ mental health began to decline. Too much homework goes hand in hand with the pressure to succeed. And many teens admittedly put this on themselves, but they do it because of all the advice and steering they get at school, from college counselors and admissions brochures…and often parents. Convince your teen that a few average grades will not change the trajectory of their life, but lack of sleep actually could.

 

School start times: Now, when you combine these issues that are keep kids up later at night with early school start times, that’s where you have the problem. Staying up later would be fine if they could just sleep later too. But they can’t.

 

Teens should still be in bed asleep when most schools start in the morning. Think about it. If they can’t get to sleep until around midnight and they need 9.25 hours of sleep, they should still be sleeping at 9 am! If we really want to fix the sleep deprivation issue, we’d have to start middle and high schools at around 10:00 or 10:30 in the morning. And that’s not about to happen. As a matter of fact, I think knowing this, is why the CDC and the American Academy of Pediatrics – have issues statements saying middle and high schools should start 8:30 or later. Do they not realize that law makers don’t see the “or later” part. They’re going to go with 8:30 at the latest. And I read so many articles saying the science is clear – school should start at 8:30. No, the science is clear – teens and tweens need over 9 hours of sleep, can’t fall asleep until around midnight so really school should start much later than 8:30 – but it’s better than 7 or 7:30.

 

So, some school districts and even state boards of education are considering later start times or have already implemented them – not even close to 10 or 10:30, of course. But I guess 8:30 seems late for some schools. I didn’t realize that so many middle and high schools start at an insane hour – like 7 or 7:30. I had no idea that any school ever started before 7:50 – when my high school started. And on top of such an early start time, many kids who ride the bus, are having to climb on board at ungodly hours – like 5 am. One researcher was quoted as saying, “To ask a teen to be up and alert at 7:30 a.m. is like asking an adult to be active and alert at 5:30 a.m.”

 

So, thankfully schools are catching on in many areas across the country. My son’s high school in South Carolina started at 8:40 several years ago. And every minute counts when you hear them beg “5 more minutes” every morning.) California now has a law prohibiting middle schools from starting before 8 am and 8:30 for high schools, Florida just passed a similar law and Nevada appears to be looking at the issue closely. And there are districts all across trying to make these changes.

 

And if you think that, “well they’re just going to stay up later if school starts later” – that’s actually not at all true. There may be some anecdotal evidence that kids stay up a little bit later but it’s not in proportion to the delayed start time. In other words,  if their school goes from a start time of 7 am (which I still can’t fathom) to 8:30, many kids may stay up another 20 minutes, but they still gain around an hour of sleep. That can be life-changing for some kids. Remember, teens aren’t lazy and irresponsible, it’s their brain working against them.

 

As Dr. Carskadon (the researcher I mentioned earlier) and other experts have pointed out however, changing something as ingrained in our society as school start times is extremely difficult - it involves major policy and societal changes. And there are lots of people to convince that the benefit would outweigh the downstream inconvenience –perhaps it’s lawmakers you have to convince, or the school boards, and then you have the parents.

 

Later times could impact parents getting to work on time, teens being left to get up, get ready and get to school alone, you have scheduling issues with siblings schools starting at different times. Then you have logistical issues like busses and drivers and school employees and their kids. A lot to be considered but there’s no doubt that in the long run if would be beneficial to our kids because the ramifications of sleep deprivation are pervasive.

 

It leads to a decline in the capacity to learn - poor grades, and higher percentages of tardiness and absenteeism. So, you could say all that homework is having the opposite affect of what educators think. Dr. Carskadon explains that adolescents with chronic sleep deprivation are walking around in a haze, which she compares to having an astigmatism. This haze affects every aspect of their mood, the ability to regulate their emotions, relationships, and focus.

She says in studies they’ve done, at least half the kids she’s evaluated were so exhausted in the morning that they exhibited some of the same symptoms as people with narcolepsy, where people just – boom – fall over into an immediate deep sleep. No wonder teachers complain that students fall asleep at their desks.

 

A few years ago, a group of researchers conducted an interesting study involving 50 adolescents between 14 and 17. The participants were restricted to 6.5 hours in bed per night for one 5-day period and required to spend 10 hours in bed per night in another 5-day period. The study found that after the 5 days of restricted sleep, the participants were more anxious, angry, tired, irritable, and less able to regulate their emotions than during the week of more time spent in bed.

 

Remember that the adolescent brain’s emotional center (the amygdala) is literally in hyperdrive, and it can often see neutral or benign issues as threatening, which means it sends the brain and body into fight or flight mode…meaning the teenager gets nervous, anxious, afraid, annoyed, angry, frustrated, so much easier (and for no reason that we can see at all at that moment). So, when you throw a lack of sleep on top of that, you have even more of a risk of emotional outbursts, meltdowns and mental health disorders cropping up. You know they use sleep deprivation to crack spies, traitors, and terrorists for a reason.

 

Experts also say that the lack of sleep can cause adolescents to show symptoms associated with ADHD, including hyperactivity, lack of focus and inability to stay on task – and this can lead to a real possibility of a misdiagnosis. Obviously, for a kid who actually has ADHD, sleep deprivation exacerbates their symptoms – and kids with ADHD generally have a much harder time falling asleep too. It’s an awful situation – trust me.

 

Studies have also linked adolescent sleep deprivation to nicotine, caffeine, and alcohol use – they’re doing anything they can to stimulate their brain (even though alcohol is a depressant). And according to the CDC, teens who don’t get enough sleep are more likely to engage in other unhealthy or risky behaviors; skip exercise and be overweight.

 

It’s also been shown that teens who don’t get enough sleep are twice as likely to show symptoms of depression. Numerous studies have also found evidence of a link between insufficient sleep and suicidal ideation in teens. As a matter of fact, it’s also been shown that kids who get fewer than 7 hours of sleep a night are (quote) “68% more likely to have at least one risk factor for suicide.”

 

Researchers have literally found that the longer they can give teens to sleep, the more they could reduce their negative mood. And what parent anywhere doesn’t get excited about having a less moody teenager, right?

 

But one risk you might not even think about is driving. Driving to school without enough sleep the night before, can be deadly. Research shows that driving drowsy is as dangerous as driving drunk – it slows reaction time, attention, good decision-making. And because the prefrontal cortex, which controls executive functions like focus and making good decisions is still being programmed in adolescents, they already have deficits here. Not getting enough sleep compounds these issues.

 

According to a AAA study, around 328,000 car crashes are caused by drowsy drivers annually and according to the National Safety Council, people are three times more likely to be in a car crash when they’re tired. And according to the National Sleep Foundation, drivers under the age of 25 are the most at-risk group for falling asleep behind the wheel.

 

So, clearly, the bottom line is that adequate sleep is not only essential to the adolescent’s social, emotional, and intellectual development but also to their mental health and physical safety.

 

But what can you do to help? Well, unless you want to take on the school board or the state and push for later start times (and by all means, if you have the bandwidth for that – go for it) – but I’m going to give you some simpler things to try.

 

And here’s the thing – don’t go trying to change several things at once. Once small change, if it’s the right one for your kid, can be enough to make a big difference. So, first of all talk to your teen about it, ask them how they feel about the amount of sleep they get each night. Ask them if they’d like to try something new to help them get to sleep a little earlier or to help them sleep better. Let them talk and you just listen and try to get whatever it is they’re trying to tell you. Then you tell them your concerns, some of the science you’ve heard in this podcast and elsewhere and why you think it’s important for them to get as much sleep as possible at night. Then ask for their input about what to try first – can they think of anything that might help? And if they don’t come up with anything out of the clear blue, you can throw out a few options from what I’m about to go over, talk about it and see if you can agree on something to try. Just pick one thing and try it for a few days – even a full week – and see what happens. If it doesn’t help, decide if you can tweak it in some way and try it again, or brainstorm and pick something else to try. Eventually something will click.

 

 

Let’s start with the most problematic thing – Screens. Lisa Damour, a clinical psychologist author and podcaster says none of us should have a phone in our bedroom at night. And although I agree, I get it. I’m not sure I could give it up at this point. I have a hard time watching TV without my iPad or my phone in my hand too – usually I’m window shopping or on Pinterest or playing a game and then some nights the TV’s just background noise and I read on my phone.

 

Damour has a really great suggestion for our kids though: She suggests setting a rule when you first get that youngest kid a phone (I don’t know, it could be too late for the older ones) – get them to agree right up front that they will not even ask to have their phone in the bedroom at night.

 

But seriously, even with older kids who are used to having it in their room, I would do my best to negotiate a deal – make an exchange – anything you can to get that phone out of their room at least, AT bedtime. And I don’t mean move it to the kitchen or out in the hall. Many kids, especially if they’ve had it in their room for a while – they’re gonna’ start jonesin’ for that phone after you go to bed. You take that phone in your bedroom and if you have to, put it under lock and key. And I’ll say this too – this is not just about sleep but there are things they can get into and people they can talk to on their phone after your sound asleep, and they’re savvy enough that you’d never catch it.

And if you can get them to turn it all off at least one hour before bed – that’s great. Gaming – 2 hours. You might even agree that there’s no social media past a certain time even if they’re on their phone. Again, it’s about negotiation.

And if screens are simply unavoidable up until bedtime, then remember that passive screens don’t impact sleep as much. So, rather than gaming or scrolling, watching TV is better (can you believe we’ve gotten to the point where we’d beg our kids to watch TV?) And small screens are better than enormous screens (less blue light) and you can even get them some blue light filtering glasses or an app. And sitcoms are better than something suspenseful.

What about homework? Again, it needs to be a negotiation – not an order. But discuss them finishing their homework as soon as they can after school. Explain that putting it causes them to stay up later (if it actually is) and encourage them to do as much as possible at school if they’re given the opportunity. And by all means, if your school or the teachers give too much homework, get together with other parents and talk to them or start a petition or go to the next school board meeting with a big group. If they’re not starting later in the morning, the least they can do is cut back on homework.

 

And you can really help out by making sure they understand that getting enough sleep is a priority and there needs to be a cut-off time for homework. All the more reason to start earlier. Make sure they also know that nothing is more important to you than their mental health and wellness, including grades and getting into that fabulous college.

 

In that same vein, talk about the extracurriculars, the afterschool job, the volunteer work and make sure they know they don’t have to be the best and brightest and most athletic and some star performer – that you love them for who they are, not the amount of “stuff” they can accomplish.

 

Other pretty simple changes you can help them with are to:

 

Avoid caffeine after they get home in the afternoons – all the way through bedtime. Don’t even keep in the house if it’s too much of a temptation – that actually includes chocolate – and look at the sodas – some of those you wouldn’t think, have caffeine. And if they’re getting energy drinks somehow on the way home – have a talk with them about how that might be really doing a number on their sleep.

 

Something else that can keep them awake is eating too close to bedtime. Try to get them to avoid snacks within an hour and a half or so of bedtime. If they have reflux, allergies or any sort of gastro issue, this could delay sleep.

 

Of course, eating healthy food and getting plenty of exercise are two of the very basic things they can concentrate on.

 

And if your teen just has a terrible time with sleep like mine did, talk to your pediatrician about the possibility of using melatonin. Now these supplements aren’t regulated and there’s not much known about long-term effects on adolescents – so proceed with care.

 

And there aren’t any prescription drugs approved in the U.S. to treat childhood insomnia. The American Academy of Sleep Medicine says prescription medication for kids or teenagers is usually not the best solution because doctors are really just modifying an adult dosage based on weight.

 

One thing we did that worked pretty well when he would do it, is either soft music (not rap or pop – more like lullabies!), white noise or a simple meditation. Now, I didn’t know it was meditation at the time, but I would talk to him softly and walk him through his breathing and his arms and legs getting heavy and many times it worked. So, download the UCLA Mindful app on your phone – it’s free and there are tons of guided meditations. For white noise I use the Sleep Pillow app but I’m sure there are tons out there and there’s also a podcast that plays white noise (and other colors like pink and brown) it’s called 12-hour sound machines and they also have a YouTube channel if that works better for you.

 

Something else that’s very helpful is routines – just like with everything else in a kid’s life. And this is just as important when their 12, 15 or 17 as it was when they were a baby – maybe even more important. A bedtime routine signals the brain that it’s time for sleep. You might start with the turning off of the electronics and go from there. They could write in their journal (which is great for them emotionally and to brain dump so they don’t have all that stuff swimming around up there while they’re trying to sleep), get their backpack cleaned out and re-packed, make sure they have clothes to wear, know where their shoes are and have their practice clothes or band instrument or whatever else they need all laid out together – explain how much time this will save in the mornings – it might buy them 10 extra minutes of sleep!

 

After all that’s done, they could do the bathroom routine, turn down the lights, get in the bed, turn on the white noise, music or meditation while you’re in the other room with your fingers crossed (or in bed).

 

Now, one thing that drives me nuts and it might bug your teen or possibly keep them awake, is light coming into the room or lights in the room. We have a street light out in front of the house and if I don’t have the curtains pulled all the way together, that light comes streaming in and I can’t do it. I have apple TV – I have to keep a black sock folded over the bright blue light. There’s a tiny heater under my desk with a little red light that I have to pull the waist basket in front of. There’s a surge protecter to the left of the desk that I’ve made a cardboard cover for, so I can’t see that red light…and the funny thing is, my husband can walk in here with all the lights on and the TV going and crawl right in bed, roll over and go to sleep…while I’m putting the sock and the waste basket and the box over all the lights in the room! Oh, and he just reminded me a while ago that I also wear silk blinders over my eyes! I know – I’m – what can I say?! But hey – your kid might be as weird as me and might not even realize it yet!

 

Also, about that bedroom. If they can avoid doing anything in there other than sleeping – that’s supposed to help (I’m pretty horrible about that one).

 

What about getting them OUT of bed and awake in the morning? If you can do it really nicely, open those curtains and turn on a little light – that’s what signals the brain’s biological clock that it’s time to wake up. And since they won’t have their phone in the room, use an old-fashioned alarm clock but put it all the way across the room so they have to get out of bed to turn it off.

 

But you know, the smell of breakfast – specifically, I’m thinking bacon and eggs but if they’re vegan, I’m sure you can come up with something equally as aromatic. I know I’m now expecting a lot of you – you could bring the toaster into the bedroom and pop the Eggos in! My husband did breakfast so I can’t say anything.

 

Something else that worked for us was turning on his favorite tunes in the morning. And I tried something I thought was pretty brilliant there for a while until he started ignoring me: I’d just stand in his room and say, Oh my gosh, are you kidding? What is that? How did that happen? Or something like that, and he’d always open his eyes and sit up to see what they heck was going on.

 

What about napping and sleeping in on the weekends?

There are various opinions about this but generally most experts say to avoid napping after school if at all possible. It’s just like letting a baby sleep too long at that afternoon nap – it will keep them from sleeping at night. If they just can’t stay awake, get them to agree to keep it under 30 minutes and no later than 5 pm.

 

Then on the weekend, and this is where some people disagree. I say see what works but I know for us, he didn’t often stay up longer than 2 hours past bedtime (until he was acting out later) and we’d get him up (or he’d just wake up within a couple of hours of the time he’d get up the rest of the week. Most people agree that staying up all night over the weekend and sleeping all day Saturday and Sunday just makes it worse for them to try and get to sleep Sunday night, which then just snowballs into the rest of the week. It’s a severe disruption to their brain’s biological clock.

 

Now, here are a few tips you can give your teen if they’re willing to listen:

 

  • Don't look at the clock – it will only make you more anxious about falling asleep if it’s later than you want it to be
  • Don't try and force yourself to fall asleep – turn on a very dim light and flip through a book, use the guided meditation app again, etc. but keep it low-key
  • If you have something on your mind, write it down in your journal or keep a notebook for just that reason sitting by your bed so you can jot things down as you think of them – now it’s on paper and hopefully, out of your mind
  • If you keep having problems, I’ll help you keep a sleep log, and we’ll write down what you did the hour before bed and how much you slept – and see if we can figure out a pattern. We’ll keep trying different things until we find something that works.

 

So, you know the issues now – you know your kid’s not the only one and that there are good reasons they’re not getting to sleep early and that they’re having a hard time getting up in the morning. And chronic sleep deprivation can lead to some devastating consequences for adolescents. So, if your child is having trouble going to sleep or staying asleep, the American Academy of Sleep Medicine recommends the first step in a treatment plan is to use behavior modification like all the things I just went over - but if after trying one thing at a time, you just don’t hit on anything that helps, then talk to their pediatrician and then do your homework regarding any recommendations they make. And you may want to consider therapy – a counselor may be able to help if they’re having difficulty with their thoughts at bedtime.

 

Now, a lot of what I’ve talked about today is contained in my guide, “Why Doesn’t My Teen Sleep?” and you can find the link in the list of guides right there in the episode description in the app where you’re listening. So, grab that guide and see what you can do to help your teen get more sleep.

 

Alright - That’s it for Speaking of Teens today. The link for the show notes is in the episode description – I’ll have my sources and resources there for you.

And thank you so much listening today – this episode was suggested by a listener, Thank you Teri! If you have an episode suggestion or a specific question you’d like addressed on the show, you can go to speakingofteens.com and scroll down to the message button to send us up to a 90 second voice message. Just let us know at the end whether you’ll let us play it on air or not – and I’ll only mention your first name either way.

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Speaking of Teens is sponsored by neurogility.com, where I help parents build stronger relationships and decrease conflict with their teens.

Our producer and editor is Steve Coleman; researched, written, and hosted by me, Ann Coleman.